Breaking free of self-imposed limits.

Heya friend!

This week, we’re trying on new shoes as we dance………..

I’ll explain. :)

Back when I first began to study mind-body dance, I learned a lot about how beneficial it is to be barefoot. And though there is no pressure to be barefoot in Aya (shoes are always welcome), I’m a big fan of being barefoot as much as possible (if it feels good to your body). So much so, that for over fifteen years I’ve primarily worn shoes that mimic being barefoot. I absolutely love how they allow my feet to move really freely and be responsive.

BUT my barefoot-inspired toe-shoes look really… different.

In the past fifteen years of wearing toe shoes, I don’t know if there was ever a day when I’d be in public and someone didn’t comment on them. My shoes definitely stood out and drew attention. About two years ago, I decided to just give in and buy a conventional style of running shoe to wear around town. My goal was to blend in and look normal when going, for example, to the library. And it worked! No one commented on my conventional shoes. No one cared. SUCCESS! 

BUT it turns out, that blending in was coming at a cost. Slowly but surely, my feet began to constrict to fit the (tighter, pointier) shape of the more conventional running shoes. Instead of my toes being happily spread out, wiggly, and responsive, they were starting to squish together. Unfortunately, the shrinking and restricting was happening so slowly, I didn’t notice it.

When it was time for ordering a new pair, instead of going with conventional again, I ordered myself a new kind of barefoot shoe I had heard of. They have a bunch of wonderful barefoot-like qualities, but look more like normal athletic shoes. Perfect. I put them on and immediately fell in love. They were so comfortable! I’ve worn them pretty much everywhere for the past five months. 

UNTIL last week. We were doing some outdoor projects, and (to keep my new shoes clean) I put on that older pair of conventional running shoes. OH. MY. GOODNESS. They were so painful! So tight! So restrictive! It had only been a few months since I had worn them, but I couldn’t believe I had EVER worn them. My feet felt so crunched and uncomfortable that after a short while, I refused to wear them ever again.

It was definitely an aha moment….

But it isn’t really about shoes…

In an attempt to fit in and just be “normal,” I had slowly squeezed myself into a tighter, more restricted, confined space. Doing so was so gradual, I didn’t really notice the shrinking happening. It wasn’t until I finally gave myself more space —more freedom— again that it became obvious how restricted I had become.

This experience had me thinking back to 25+ years ago, when I first started mind-body dancing, and how incredibly liberating it felt. How, once having tasted that freedom, I didn’t want to go back to being inhibited.

I wonder if sometimes we don’t realize how much we’ve restricted ourselves… how much we’re holding ourselves back… how tight we’ve become… how small… how inhibited…. UNTIL we suddenly find ourselves in a space where we can open up, spread out, expand, and express ourselves more fully and freely.

A space like Aya. 

• It’s that moment when we dance (and/or sing!) for the first time who knows how long…

• When we stretch our hands out wide and our chest goes “ahhhhh, thank you, I needed that.”

• When we let go, release, and just allow our body to MOVE…

• When we allow our voice to yell “Hiyah!” and kick with ALL of our might…

• When we let ourselves be silly and have fun…

• And more….

Thoughts, friend? Does this resonate at all?

Have you ever experienced something similar? Have you ever had a moment (in Aya or elsewhere) when you suddenly experienced more space —more freedom— and then you didn’t want to go back to the prior restriction or inhibition?

Exploring that kind of spaciousness and freedom is what we’ll be playing this week.

We can focus on doing so physically by simply opening up, reaching, stretching out, and freeing up our tissues and joint ranges of motion. Or feel free to perhaps explore a more spacious, broader, boundless sense of self.

We’ll dance, explore, and just see what happens. 

Maybe nothing… 

Or maybe we’ll discover that we’ve been holding back, holding in, tightening up, and constricting in a way we weren’t aware of. 

And then, who knows… maybe we’ll decide to throw out that tight-fitting “shoe” in favor of spreading out our toes (and our wings).

As always, can’t wait to dive in with you. See you soon!

With love,

💛 Dani